Are You There, Blog? It's Me, Stephanie.

Dear Blog,

It has been quite some time since I last wrote, and I am certain you must feel somewhat neglected. I wouldn't blame you in the least if you didn't want to hear from me ever again.

I have no excuse for leaving you the way I did, so suddenly and without so much as a goodbye. One day, I wasn't there anymore.

For me, it wasn't so sudden. The term "falling off the wagon" isn't entirely accurate. That makes it sound so simple, and there's so much more to it than that. Your foot slips off at first, then you notice your shoelace is untied, and while you're leaning over to tie your shoelace the wagon hits a bump and knocks you off the seat and you grab onto the wagon cover as you try to get your footing, but then the canvas starts to tear and you go with it, flying off the back of the wagon and hanging onto the shredded material as you're dragged behind until you can't hang on any longer, and you're left there on the ground covered in dust and road rash and hugging a tumbleweed, watching the wagon drive off in the distance. And all you want is a Big Mac, fries and an ice cream sundae.

Long story short, I fell off the wagon. (Oh, wait...now I get it...) I can say that I learned some interesting and important things about myself in the process. First, I am a stress eater. Second, I am an emotional eater. Third -- put the two together and get out of the way, because if you don't I'm going to run you over on my way to the nearest Dairy Queen.

So Blog, you can probably deduce from this that things have been a bit stressful for me lately. I know I should have talked to you about it instead of running away, and I hope you can forgive me and give me a chance to make it up to you.

I am both lucky and amazed that despite the fact that I've been splurging quite a lot over the last few months, I have come through with my initial weight loss success intact. I can't say the same for my ego, which is more than a little bruised from the fall but should make a full recovery in time.

I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm sorry for being away for so long -- and I promise that I will try to be better about writing and keeping you in the loop about what's going on. I'm also going to remember that I'm only human, and that I don't have to be perfect -- like everyone else, I'm going to get through each day and make the most of what I've got in this life. Along those lines, I'm working on a little bit of a different, and less perfectionist, relationship with food.

Anyway Blog, I hope this clears things up at least a little bit. And that we can be friends again. Maybe we can share an ice cream sundae one of these days.

Love,
Stephanie